On changing seasons.

Thursday 7 October 2021

Here we are again - as usual, time has flown and has brought us back to Autumn. Although it is my favourite time of year, it's hard to believe that we're sitting here again after another pandemic filled year. Until we had our holiday this year, I hadn't really appreciated how much change we have all faced and how much we have to process. I know I took that as a sign that I need to prioritise rest and allow myself time to deal with everything that has happened in the last (almost) 2 years.

I always do my best 'processing' by the sea.

For me, the transition to autumn brings permission to hibernate - to get cosy and enjoy being home. It's also a time to cook, bake and enjoy my favourite seasonal things; soups, stews, bread, pumpkin pie, parkin and hot chocolates. It's a reason to light all the candles, snuggle up in blankets, jumpers and wooly socks. To go on long walks in the crisp fresh air and take in all the autumn colours. I've also been sea-swimming regularly and in the colder months it is even more refreshing and awakening and I love getting wrapped up with a flask of something hot afterwards. This year I plan on swimming right through winter - wish me luck! 

Mount Stewart - my favourite place to walk in Autumn


I decided to mark the transition in our home this time and I love the decor I've managed to find, though the challenge is to stop adding to it! I made a very simple leaf garland and some Pumpkins from old jumpers that I got from our local Charity shop. They were a fun and easy make and are decorations I can use again! I plan on doing some foraging for pine cones and acorns to bring a bit more nature indoors. I have perhaps mentioned this before but a number of years ago I read The Little Book of Hygge by Meik Wiking and it really changed my perspective on the autumn/winter months. I appreciate them so much more now! 

The shift in seasons for me is happening both literally and metaphorically. After a lot of hard work and the most stress I've ever experienced - I have recently changed from student to post-grad again. Although our graduation ceremony won't take place until spring 2022, I have officially passed my MA degree and my certificate and transcript is making its' way to me. I learnt so much through this degree, and so many life-changing things happened whilst I was trying to complete it. Job changes, house moves, country moves and new relationships to name a few. I enjoyed my final research piece and for once am proud of myself for achieving that milestone whilst the world was so influx. For those interested, my MA was in Theology, and studying it at this level totally changed my perspective on faith and religion, and although I won't go in to that here - I feel a greater sense of freedom on the other side of it than I did going into it - I had many, many questions and it was good to come across so many different perspectives. What I will say is that Church and I have a complicated relationship and I am taking a very deliberate break from it whilst I continue to explore my own spirituality and beliefs. I am happy to be in that place with it - for something like theology - there are of course no hard and fast answers, so I will see how it evolves for me. 

The next change on the very near horizon is my job. After just over 2.5 years, I am getting ready to move on from my first job in Northern Ireland. Whilst I do feel nervous about the transition, I know it will be a positive change for me. My head knows it is ready for a new challenge and to physically get back out into the world after working from home since March 2020. I hope to meet new people, try new things and find different opportunities. I have trusted my gut instinct for many of the big moves in my life and this one felt so right or "serendipitious" as a few people have called it. Everything fell into place to make my new role happen and I feel deeply grateful for it. 

It has been a difficult year for our family as we have navigated the loss of my Grandad and other challenges that are coming our way. Especially lately, I have been navigating feelings of guilt for not physically being there to support whilst also knowing that if I hadn't made the move, I wouldn't be in a position where I am truly living the life I'd always dreamed of. I am sure that some of us are just born with a "wanderlust" spirit and we feel compelled to carve out our own path in new places, but it always carries such sacrifice. Tom and I will soon be reaching our 2 year anniversary - he has been the best support I could ever have imagined. He has truly been a rock whilst I greived, met deadlines, agonised over big decisions and all that's in between. 

I'll conclude with this image, taken on our recent holiday to Donegal. A rainbow on Portnoo beach; a sign of hope. A reminder of the beauty we can find even when we're in the middle of a storm.




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