'I Am who I say I Am.'

It's been a little while since I have tip tapped; a few of us have had an unwelcome visit from a nasty but brief stomach bug, added to the general busyness of life - which meant I had little time to stop and think. Plus, now that my town has a cinema & Breaking Dawn Part 2 has been released - I've been a little preoccupied (i'm not ashamed to admit that I guess I am officially a 'twihard.')

However, I had a bit of time today after a nice conversation with my friend in my favourite quirky town to begin reading a book I had promised my friend I would take a look at so we could then discuss it. We agreed to do one chapter at a time, and the fact that I am writing after one chapter may well tell you that it is a good one! The book is here; check it out. Though I'm only just starting it has already given me some food for thought.

I know parts of it link back to posts I've written here in the past, based around trying to define ourselves with 'roles' and 'titles.' I've also written here before about one of my favourite subjects; contentment. This links to that too. I want to share this paragraph first of all:

'Jesus' sense of identity is striking. He has personal confidence, strength and security - as comfortable in urban Jerusalem as in rural Galilee. He can talk to the religious leaders of the Sanhedrin as easily as to a leper or roadside beggar. He can creatively diffuse hostile theological questions set to trap him by Scribes and Pharisees, and with equal skill calm the traumatised. Jesus is as relaxed at the meal table with tax collectors and prostitutes as he is at a banquet laid on by a local dignitary. When a woman of ill repute publicly kisses his feet, her actions cause him no embarrassment whatsoever, though everyone around is scandalised. He breaks the traditions of Sabbath keeping when he considers it necessary, but is quite happy to comply with social expectations when matters of justice or integrity are not at stake.'

I love this. It shows Jesus as a man who knew who he was. He knew what he stood for, and he was completely comfortable with that. He didn't need to answer to anyone because he was completely at ease with his identity. This meant he would relate to anyone, in exactly the same manner regardless of occupation/past/history/rank etc. This is such a great aspect to the man that Jesus was. I think it's one of the things that made him so radical. So if we are to follow this example, what do we need to do?

We need to throw off insecurity, fear, desire to please people, lack of confidence and instead; embrace who we are. The good parts and the bad parts. There are parts of me that I just can't escape - for example, i'm a complete introvert. I get energy when i'm away from people, if i've been around people for too many hours in a day I get stressed, I lose patience and I need to shut myself away and watch a film or something to sort myself out! I can't get away from that, because it is ME. I am also very honest, perhaps at times a bit too honest but it's ok, i'm also alright at apologising when I need to! I have reached a point in my life whereby I know myself, I know who I am and I comfortable with that - both inside and outside. I don't think people are often prepared to meet someone who is secure because it can appear slightly intimidating. Don't get me wrong, I am not 100% free from insecurity; but I am well aware of the insecurities I do have and I make a conscious effort to stop those getting out of control. Insecurity can most definitely be overcome & it MUST be!

One of things we are really good at is the art of comparing ourselves to others. The old, 'I wish I had hair like her,' 'If only I were as funny as he is' or 'they have it all together, why would they understand me?' I know I do it all the time. But it's not helpful for us! Instead of always looking at what others are doing/acting like we need to think about who WE are, are we being real? Are we being true to ourselves? What can I change about my thoughts to make me love who I am better? We can't ignore that loving ourselves IS important as it helps us to extend that love to others. We were not designed to hate ourselves or dislike who we are, quite the opposite. Why not channel your energy away from what you aren't, what 'they' are, and think about who you are. You are a beautiful, unique creation afterall...


I read this on a tweet this morning and thought it summed this all up very well:

"You're blessed when you're content with just who you are—no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought."
Matthew 5:5

Contentment with your situation and/or yourself is the best place you can be. It's a battle to stay there - don't get me wrong and we naturally have our up and down days but I can sit here and say that I am at ease with who I am, not defined by what I do or have done, but just because as I am me. 

http://www.minnamayblog.com/

Much Love xxx

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Things I've learnt from the Tetley Tea Advert.

Before I start writing: Watch it here.

I saw this advert a while ago, and whilst my heart is all for Yorkshire Tea (as everybody knows) - I thought it made an excellent point. Right at the beginning of my blogging days, I posted about 'Private Life' (scroll down my page and take a look after!) and this need we feel to share so much of our lives online. I hold my hands up and say I am guilty as charged, as those of you who know me are probably thinking right now. I guess it's just become a part of life for us all really, it's almost become a bit of a reflex in some ways. See, I take photos all the time. Usually of things that I love, things that inspire me, nature, coffee or family and I just share it. If those things are important to me, people might care. Or, perhaps not.

This advert addresses this issue so well. Instead of throwing on facebook that 'we have a new job' or 'we're going on holiday' why don't we instead call up our closest friends, the ones who actually care and share it with them first? Lately, I've spent a lot of time on the phone, catching up with people who think they are calling me for 5 minutes and then boom, an hour has passed. But I LOVE that because we are sharing life! Talking is good. I am also quite famous for sitting in coffee shops. I have calculated that there may be 2 coffee shops in my entire town that I have never been in. Just to give you a better picture of what this means: my town has an excess of two things in particular: Hairdressers and Coffee Shops. Anywho, though I do love coffee - more importantly, Coffee Shops offer me time to sit, face to face with a friend who can have my undivided attention. I love losing track of time, having my phone on silent and getting lost in conversation. (For those of you who know what 'love languages' are - mine is Quality Time.) In that time, that conversation is my priority and is the most important thing in the world to me.

Now, all the things I have been to lately; meetings, conferences etc - one thing has cropped up that ties them all together. It's the light bulb moment of 'why have we not been meeting each other before?!' We are all really good (me included) at sending email after email or doing things on the phone, which creates a million other jobs and phone calls and messages that need to be sent, communication ultimately breaks down and the job falls through. So, instead - we meet face to face. We see each other, we give each other time and we share more information than we would through typing. I've personally learnt the value of this through networking in order to find work. If I meet 'that relevant person' I can say 'I need a job' or 'can I help you do this' etc. My face is known, and people will think of me when a job is either created or advertised.

So, what is my point in all of this? Instead of investing in '600' online acquaintances, take your best friend out for lunch. Ring your mum, send your friend a letter, have a dinner party, arrange a catch up and make the effort to know and appreciate the people in your lives who are the ones on which you can rely. In your work, or personal lives - if you are trying to set up a team, organise a project, start a new group then MEET your people. Face to face. Also, get some biscuits. Meet regularly, to ensure that you are all communicating and sharing effectively because this will improve everything, I assure you! Sometimes you might think that it sounds so simple that you can't believe you didn't think of it before, to sit in the same room together and talk. But we just hardly do it anymore...who really likes meetings?! But I want to say that they offer something key that we are losing, they are not always a nuisance - they are an opportunity to be human, to build relationships (working and personal) and to learn together.

For when the busyness of life takes over (as it so naturally does) choose to slow down, get a cup of tea, catch up with a person you love and let them be your focus. People will always be more important than things.

Much Love xxx 

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Life as a Post-Grad.

I can't believe I'm a post graduate. That wonderful time all came and went far too quickly, and if you've been following my journey for a while - you will know it has had it's ups and downs, as has life since I finished my studies. But now, it's all officially a closed chapter...but one that I can look back on, treasure and be thankful for. It's up to us (as friends) to maintain the beautiful friendships that were created for it will be all too easy for us to drift apart and though for some of us that is bound to happen, there are a few that I don't want to do life without.

The day of graduation was laced with grand tradition. It had a very Harry Potter-esque feel to it as the ceremony took place in Chester Cathedral (well worth a visit as it is a stunner) with the opening of the event being trumpet fanfare. We had a great speech from some guy (he obviously made a great impression) who mentioned a few things that really inspired me. He said that we, as graduates have been given this opportunity to gain a degree - which is something that is not given to everybody. I know this all too well living where I do, where unemployment levels as well as motivation levels are generally very low in select communities. He said that with this in mind, we should not concentrate solely on furthering our own careers or spend our lives seeking more opportunities for our own gain - we should seek to use our knowledge and skills to improve the lives of those around us who are less fortunate. I was so GLAD he recognised this. In my line of work, I was never going to step into it with a selfish motive and I was certainly never going to be in it for the money (as if I was I would have been sorely disappointed) but helping others has always been my goal.

That of course, is not the same for everybody. I don't want to pinpoint anybody or any course in particular but I think we can easily become so entangled in our own progression that we stop seeing what is happening in the life of our struggling neighbour. We all have a responsibility to help each other and it doesn't always have to be big things (see my previous post entitled 'Townstock' for ideas.) With the education that we have been given, we can use it to benefit our community, society or world for the better OR we can use it solely to gain one up on others. I am not at all saying that progressing in your business/job is always a bad thing, success is good and promotions are a part of working life but I do think your motivation should be thought through - I have been blessed to have an experience that not everybody can share so I want the fruits of that to be of benefit to others.

Life has looked much the same for the past few months and until I get my work break through I know it wont change that much. I have my good days and bad days, frustrations and confusions but overall I have no choice but to keep doing what I am doing. Seeking opportunities, meeting people and ultimately, waiting. This time has, however brought me new friendships, restored old ones and blessed me with time to spend with treasured ones. I would be lying if I said I am happy to stay in this situation for too much longer but this is out of my hands! I am hoping that in a few months time I can look back on all of this as a stronger person who is more appreciative of the life I have been given for I will only have it once!

I will leave you with a couple of momentos from the biggest day of my life so far...

I have waited my entire life to throw that hat.

At least I caught it!

Outside the Cathedral (the only one wearing florals...)

With my degree...!

- How can you use the knowledge/expertise you have to help others?

- What were your favourite things about University?

P.s. my dad took these photos and would be mortified if I didn't credit him...www.dennisgoodwinphotography.com

Much Love xxx

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Townstock.

This week, I was privileged to help out at an utterly inspirational conference in my local town. Before I had even heard of this conference, I'd been getting these random bursts (check my twitter) of just loving my town and my county. Everyone who met me when I lived in Chester will know how passionate I was about Yorkshire simply because I would bang on about it constantly because I always had a deep yearning to be there. Every time I had a reading week, I would just be so happy to revel in its hills, quirks and eebygums. I missed it. Now that I am back, I am seeing my home with fresh eyes and I am genuinely so excited to be here right now.

I have been able to meet lots of new people, from all walks of life who are running such incredible projects that have been motivated by this same love I feel. I've met people who appreciate everything Halifax and it's surrounding areas have, and they've noticed that it's no longer helpful to moan about our out of touch government doing nothing for us - when we could just do it ourselves. One of my favourite quotes was from a speaker representing an amazing campaign we have called 'Totally Locally.' He said that 'often the people who change their town will be the ones who were born there that move away and come back.' That one hit me square in the eyes because I had wondered why everything seemed new and different! It wasn't just me!

Some of this stuff is exactly what I've been writing/thinking about over these past few months; slowing down, working together, living simply and loving the place you're at. So when I saw this - I did a little squeal of joy:

The Totally Locally 'Manifesto.'

There are so many things in life that we have lost due to the rapid growth of technology. We shop online which means we take money out of our local economy and cut out the middle man of actually talking face to face with someone in a building. We focus on big brands/big names and forget about the independent retailer down the road.We walk past empty shops in our town centres. We've stopped taking risks. These are all issues that were addressed at this conference. The Totally Locally nationwide campaign is to get us to re-invest in our local butchers, shop-keepers, greengrocers, cafés etc and we can achieve this by doing as little as spending £5 each a week in a local business. A small investment that will positively impact all of our futures. I love this movement! It's so important for organisations that have the same interests to begin to meet with each other and establish working relationships because this creates unity and a common goal. It allows us to create quote 'an US culture not a ME culture.' We need to begin to think about what we can GIVE and not GET because this will improve life for everyone.

We also heard from Dan Thompson - a great user of Twitter who gathered troops to clean up after the London riots and who now spreads the good news of Pop up shops. He said a few things that I loved too - it was all very simple and practical but sometimes those are the things we forget. He said we need to 'commit to our dreams' - if you have something that you would really LOVE to do then quote 'get out there and do it' because committing means that something will happen. I have spoken before of our fear to commit; what if it all goes wrong, what if I can't do it, what if it doesn't work the way I had hoped? Well - what if it DOES work? I was in a room full of people who had held these little dreams, that perhaps became known through a chat over a pint but were now affecting not just their own communities but in some cases - over 76 communities! Did they predict that would happen? No, probably not! One speaker had said that 'they created a monster' because their small dream grew so quickly. I found this fascinating. The sharing of these ideas inspired so many people who will have left changed - that will now I am sure, be working on making their dreams for their local area a reality. 

One noteable movement has changed a community through growing vegetables. 'Incredible Edible' was a movement that started by planting seeds that would be available for the general public to harvest and eat. It was a way of breaking barriers between neighbours and those whose paths would not normally cross and for a movement that started from growing beans it is now responsible for changing the lives and attitudes of an entire community! This idea has now spread to 37 towns and it's focus is not to grow great veg but to start a small movement that will empower the individual to make a change and positive impact for the future of others. This idea is quote 'not rocket science' but it is so inspiring!

We also heard from vInspired who are doing lots of great things to engage young people in volunteering. The speaker - Terry Ryall made some excellent points about the negative view cast upon young people by adults and said that quote 'young people are not something wrong that need to be fixed, rather they are an asset.' I did a little AMEN inside at that point. Young people are so passionate - they think first with their emotions and find it natural to speak out upon injustice, (this is what I LOVE about working with them) when this is put to positive use - their potential is great. When we see young people as an asset - we can turn them into an opportunity by asking quote 'what are YOU passionate about and how can WE take action on that?'

Some inspiring ideas that came directly from young people were found in 'Teenage Markets' in Stockport set up by Joseph Barratt (an excellent communicator) that used the creativity of its citizens to do something for and by young people. He spoke of 'collaborating and fusing generations' i.e. bringing people together to provide something new and fun for their area. I loved this idea as it put the power back into the hands of the young, young people thrive off being given responsibility and ownership - this is something we MUST invest in and encourage. 

Following on from this, I enjoyed the talk given by Adrian Bird from Halifax Opportunities Trust as he spoke to businesses about the importance of quote 'funding projects that help the young.' Not only this, but we must educate young people to understand that quote 'nearly all employment opportunities have value - the embarrassment barrier needs to be broken down.' He put forward a great suggestion that businesses and organisations should invite young people in to give them hands on experience, but also organisations should have 'a youthful workforce that they are prepared to develop.' Speaking from my own experience in my current job search - this is not happening enough!

To conclude, it seems that individuals who want to make a change in the place they live are getting up and doing it. We can't sit here just wishing things were different when we could be the ones to shake it up! I personally have been motivated to continue searching for the right job but in the meantime - this is the place I want to be. I am blessed to know some of these incredibly inspirational people and will continue to seek to help wherever I can. I would encourage you to put feet to your dreams, to get off your bum and to be the change because you never know where it might lead! 

A few questions...

- What is going on in your local area?

- Is there anything you can get involved with?

- Do you volunteer anywhere?

- What would you like to change?

- What is stopping you?

For further information on all the people/organisations I have mentioned:

- Townstock

- Totally Locally

- vInspired

- Dan Thompson

- Joseph Barratt

- Incredible Edible

- Halifax Opportunities Trust

Much Love xxx

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