On establishing a new rhythm.

It's hard to believe how fast time is flying by at the moment. I had heard people say that once children are in the picture that the "days are long but the years are short," and I can already see so much truth in that. I can't believe we already have a 9 month old who is growing by the second. We have a pretty set routine by now, which I think is helping us all to keep the rhythm of the house going. Finn especially is thriving in having his patterns and is most definitely a homebird like his Dad! Sometimes it makes our windows of opportunity to go out on trips a little smaller as he loves his naps, but I know that won't last forever, so we are adapting to that and sticking to what works for now. I think it's important to be honest and say that sometimes motherhood in these early stages can get a little lonely, and I don't have the time to give to friendships in the same way that I used to, but Tom and I talk about this a lot and we are going to try find a better balance of that. 

I went back to work part-time when Finn was 3 months old, which was a big adjustment, but it was the right decision for us. I am extremely grateful to have a job that is so flexible and allows me to be at home. I really enjoy working and it helps us keep the household afloat at a time where finances are so stretched. I like the focus it brings me and the feeling that I'm contributing to something bigger than myself. It also helps that I've always truly loved the line of work I'm in, so it doesn't feel like such a chore to be doing it. We are now in a place where I work out of the house one day a week, Finn is at nursery for my half day and he gets to spend time with his beloved "Ninny" (Great-Grandma) for my other day. In order for both Tom and I to work, we have sacrificed some of our time off together as a three - we currently only have one day a week to go out and enjoy family trips, but we are getting better at planning more intentional time off together so we can all make some memories and have much needed downtime.

I think all of the above; life rotating around nap times and feeding times, working, cleaning, cooking - all the things it takes to make our family work, is what is making time go so quickly! Over the last few months, I have taken Finn along to several different classes and groups, but I find that he is happiest when he is in his own surroundings, so for now I am giving that a break. We still go out every day for a walk or we play in the garden as he loves being outdoors, and I still like the chance to sit in a coffee shop for a change of scenery. I really struggle with 'cabin-fever' if I spend more than a day in the house, so I know it's important for my well-being to get out each day, even if for a short time. As we spend more time at home, I'm finding that I have more time to myself as our days together are more predictable, so I have been trying to think of ways to fill those gaps, as well as finding time to rest. 

I keep going through phases of reading, which is a pastime I've always enjoyed. I keep testing out fiction, but it is almost always a memoir that will get me hooked to the point I can't put the book down. I'm just a non-fiction reader! I've been going to a local slow cooker group as part of SureStart, which has been my favourite group so far, and that has re-inspired me to try new things in the kitchen. I find the slow cooker so handy because it takes usually less than 30 minutes to prep everything in the morning, or when Finn is occupied and then it is ready for us to enjoy in the evening. It's also a much more econmical option, as well as there being less to tidy up afterwards! I made a chicken curry packed with vegetables tonight and it was devoured! Besides that, I've been spending time in the garden which is becoming more of a hobby of mine, although most of our pots were almost destroyed in some recent strong winds! I've been learning about which plants I like and disklike, which ones to put together in a pot and which will grow to take up all the space! Our strawberry plant and blueberry bush are doing particularly well this year so that has been quite satisfying.

We will soon be having a week off together just to relax and do some nice, quiet things to help us all refresh and recharge. Tom is going to take over a bit so I can have some time with friends and still get my day out of the house. There are a few workshops coming up in the summer that I'd like to try out to see if I can find a new hobby that might entertain me either at home or as part of a group. I'd like to find something to do with my hands...something crafty or kitchen related. I've seen a bread-making class that I'm tempted by as I'd love to learn how to make some of the more traditional breads found in Ireland, and I know I have a very willing taste-tester in the house!

As I sit and reflect on how much life has changed since our boy arrived, I don't see any of it as a negative. I feel more content now than I ever have, and I love watching Finn thrive in his safe space and familiarity. Our life is slower than I've been used to, and sometimes I can feel myself wanting to be busy instead of making the most of this more peaceful season. But I am truly grateful for everything about this stage we are in, even though it of course has it's fair share of hard and exhausting moments, usually on the daily. But, as I stand and watch the joy on my sweet sons's face as he sits in a swing, with the wind in his hair, it reminds me that those times are what it's all about, and that this is where I'm supposed to be.

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My day in cups of tea.

My first confession is that this theme is taken straight from a regular feature in my favourite magazine, The Simple Things. I always enjoy reading about how other people live their days & I have been watching a bit more YouTube recently which has probably also inspired this post. I have seen various 'vlogs' or 'vlogmas' series' but some of it goes a little bit too far for me in terms of oversharing! I was watching someone recently who has a baby a month or so older than mine but she shares a daily vlog - I can only imagine how much harder everything is if she is having to film & edit every day - not something I'd like to spend my time doing! But I have taken a break from social media for a while & felt myself drawn to writing again because it is more of an outlet for me & feels like a better use of my time than constant scrolling. I've been thinking too about how much Finn might see me pick up my phone throughout the day & I don't want him to think me sitting on my phone is more important to me than his needs.

I chose to share my day in cups of tea today because we are about to start a new routine. From next week, I will be returning to work part-time but working from home. We have also just begun to re-surface after Covid entered the house, so we had an extended Christmas break with the three of us at home. Upto now we have left things fairly relaxed with the baby & a natural rhythm has emerged. But as we are on the cusp of teething & potentially sleep regression, we thought we would try bring a greater sense of routine to our days in the hope that it would benefit us all. We are all night owls which is a bit unfortunate so we are going to start with bedtime by trialling putting Finn to bed & watching him on the monitor, followed by an earlier bedtime for us to help us get more organised in the morning. So, here goes...

9amOur day started at 3am today as Finn woke up & was hungry. For some reason, he woke up several times before that wanting his dummy back so I had a pretty disturbed night up to that point. Tom did the nightfeed & then we all got back to sleep until about 8am. After feeding, changing & dressing him, I put Finn in his beloved bouncer whilst I made my first coffee of the day. My pod machine was a Christmas gift after I'd had a Nespresso machine before & switched but then I missed it! So I got out my old favourite cup which I used to use every morning when I left the house at 7am to commute to Belfast. How I don't miss those days! Anywho, today was the first time I took Finn to a baby massage class so it was a hectic morning getting everything ready. By the time we had arrived he was fast asleep and didn't wake up until nearly the end of the class, so he only got a very brief bit of massage on one leg! After this I went to pick up a prescription and we had a quick walk along the sea front. Quick being the operative word as it was so windy! 

11:30am

We returned home & I hoped I'd have chance to grab my breakfast after just having a banana before we left. Of course, I took one mouthful of cereal & Finn decided he was hungry again too! I'd just boiled the kettle ready for a cup of tea so I got to sit down & enjoy that after feeding Finn. 

We did used to have a daily contact nap but Finn didn't seem to want that anymore until yesterday when I was stood up bouncing him & he fell fast asleep on me. To my surprise, he did the same thing this afternoon & has stayed asleep which has given me the chance to sit & start this post! Whilst he was sleeping it gave me chance to catch up on some TV; I finished up the new series of Emily in Paris, watched the 1st episode of series two of Love Life (Netflix) & the 1st episode of The Great Pottery Throw Down (Channel 4). 

After I put Finn down to continue his nap, I decided it was time to put some of our decorations back up. I took down all the festive ones right after Christmas, but haven't replaced them yet with our usual things so everything looks a bit bare at the moment! We are in the midst of making some big changes to the layout of the house to create a home office space & move Finn into the bigger bedroom so we will be painting & building lots of furniture! We collected a 2nd hand daybed yesterday & have been selling bits of our furniture that we won't need anymore along the way to clear space. I've been searching the sales & found some really good bargains, most of which arrive tomorrow so that will keep Tom busy as he is the builder of things!! Overall, we need everything to be more functional for us & now seemed a good time to do it before Finn is walking about. Whilst doing my other daily jobs in the house, like cleaning the bathroom or food prep, I've been listening to "Just One Thing - with Michael Mosley," which is an interesting podcast that talks about small changes you could make in life. I've also been listening to "All in the Mind," from BBC Radio 4. 

7pm

As part of our new routine, we are trying out a bath, bottle, bed approach. Finn absolutely LOVES the bath & kicks like crazy when he's in there! I bought a Nuby watering can for the bath & as soon as he sees it he gets so excited. He has very sensitive skin like I do & we've found the best stuff for him is Child's Farm. It can be quite expensive (I always buy it on offer!) but it lasts ages. The scents are all gorgeous & the nappy cream really works. I sit & write this section at 9.30pm where Finn has been asleep now for a good hour & we are sat intently watching him on the monitor & missing him! But, given that he's already having a good rest, we know a routine is what he needs. P.s. I'm now on the decaf!

 

10pm 

I became quite fixated on skincare when I was pregnant & that has become an important part of my daily routine. I'm sure there should be some stuff that would be better done in the morning, but I like to think it will all sink into my skin overnight. I always go to the Boots sale at Christmas & this year I managed to find some nice sets of No7 skincare so I've been using that. I also found the 'Glow' facial brush which is a good exfoliator for me so I've been using that every day too. I got a free pot of Weleda Body Butter with my magazine subscription & it works so well for my skin. As does the Child's Farm handcream which I got free with an order from Boots.

I've also been trying to read again & always compile a small list throughout the year to pop on my Christmas list. I have a good pile now to work my way through, so when time allows I have been diving back into reading. After reading his previous book; "The Diary of a Bookseller," I asked for the follow up title by Shaun Bythell and have been working my way through that. It's a small book so I'm sure it won't take me long! 

Overall, it has been a busy but productive Monday for me! In between Finn's naps, I had to sort out various appointments that start up again this week like his next Health Visitor appointment & vaccinations. It was so nice to have a break from all that during Christmas but the house visits should get less frequent now. The rest of the week will be a similar level of activity but will be my last week at home just Finny & me before things change again. I'm so grateful that I can still be at home with him & he can spend a bit more time with his daddy & other family. 

Thanks for reading xo

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