On nesting and preparing.

I'm sure we all feel the same, but I've been sat wondering where this year has disappeared to. We found out that baby #2 was on the way back in April, but decided this time to make sure everything was looking OK at our 12 week scan before we shared the news with anyone. That's perhaps one of the reasons this pregnancy has absolutely flown by, but I suppose that life is also much busier than it was the first time around. Finn is keeping us very busy with his curious, active mind, and we still have the same responsibilities of work and running our home, with added hospital/midwife/doctor appointments so each week has felt very full. 

My nesting instincts this time have felt pretty strong, but in a different way than with Finn. I remember obsessively cleaning the bathroom every night before bed and having everything in his nursery meticulously organised. This time around I know we have time post-birth to get the baby room sorted because he will sleep in our room for the first few months, and all his clothes are already washed and ready to go. We do need to get some things back out of storage, but I've focussed on the bigger things we needed like a double buggy, cosy wintery clothes and a better moses basket that should last longer this time. Instead of the things I obsessed over last time like baby toiletries (most of which I donated because Finn has sensitive skin/eczema so we only really use one brand or prescription cream), I've been trying to stock up on pantry items so we have easy things to cook & reach for when we need it post-partum. We have the added benefit of knowing the things we actually needed for Finn, so that has helped cut out a lot of unnecessary spending, which is a blessing because our budget will be very tight! 

Everything in me wants to hibernate at this point, and I feel happiest when I'm at home, in my matching pyjama set (secretly hoping Santa might bring me more PJs!) with a hot chocolate. Our festive decorations have been up a while because it helps me feel so cosy, and I can't even say how many Hallmark movies I've already watched and it's not yet December. We are trying to cut down on gifts this year and keep everything minimal as we need to prepare for me going on Maternity Leave. We are focusing on the theme of "Something to read, do, share, wear, need and want," which has meant sticking to a budget and not going overboard. I wanted to start this now so we can continue this tradition down the line and not give in to the pressure of overspending at this time of year. I think it also makes you shop more creatively which is fun! I've also taken a break from social media which usually helps me focus on being present, and takes another distraction away (or temptation to shop based on whatever has come up in my feed!) I do this fairly regularly when my brain is feeling a bit overloaded, but it's also nice to not feel compelled to share so much about my daily life and just enjoy whatever each day brings.

I bought these from Etsy

I can feel myself getting pretty tired at this point, so I am trying really hard not to push myself but instead find ways to make life easier. That has meant switching to online grocery shopping, saving trips until the weekend so we can go together, or doing a lot of my Christmas shopping spread across the last few months and wrapping as I go, so most of that is already taken care of. I'm still taking Finn out for a walk every day which is good for both of us, but I've cut down on extra trips throughout the week as it is a bit of a strain for me to get him in and out of things or up and down the stairs all day. In my mind, I almost feel like I'm admitting defeat much sooner than I did last pregnancy, but in reality, we truly haven't had a week without extra appointments, random things going wrong in the house, sickness (and therefore extra Dr visits), disturbed nights due to teething and everything in-between. I have possibly mentioned this before, but we live fairly far from most things, so any trip to the hospital is about 40 minutes there and back and requires extra planning this time around as Finn likes to see what's going on and roam around, so it's easier not to take him! This week I have picked up a version of what Finn is at the tail end of, which means a sore throat and feeling rundown so we are preparing for a slow and easy weekend.

For now, I'm going back to my bubble as we take time to slow down, enjoy everything about the festive season and get ready for the arrival of baby boy. Lots of love, Sarah x

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My day in cups of tea.

My first confession is that this theme is taken straight from a regular feature in my favourite magazine, The Simple Things. I always enjoy reading about how other people live their days & I have been watching a bit more YouTube recently which has probably also inspired this post. I have seen various 'vlogs' or 'vlogmas' series' but some of it goes a little bit too far for me in terms of oversharing! I was watching someone recently who has a baby a month or so older than mine but she shares a daily vlog - I can only imagine how much harder everything is if she is having to film & edit every day - not something I'd like to spend my time doing! But I have taken a break from social media for a while & felt myself drawn to writing again because it is more of an outlet for me & feels like a better use of my time than constant scrolling. I've been thinking too about how much Finn might see me pick up my phone throughout the day & I don't want him to think me sitting on my phone is more important to me than his needs.

I chose to share my day in cups of tea today because we are about to start a new routine. From next week, I will be returning to work part-time but working from home. We have also just begun to re-surface after Covid entered the house, so we had an extended Christmas break with the three of us at home. Upto now we have left things fairly relaxed with the baby & a natural rhythm has emerged. But as we are on the cusp of teething & potentially sleep regression, we thought we would try bring a greater sense of routine to our days in the hope that it would benefit us all. We are all night owls which is a bit unfortunate so we are going to start with bedtime by trialling putting Finn to bed & watching him on the monitor, followed by an earlier bedtime for us to help us get more organised in the morning. So, here goes...

9amOur day started at 3am today as Finn woke up & was hungry. For some reason, he woke up several times before that wanting his dummy back so I had a pretty disturbed night up to that point. Tom did the nightfeed & then we all got back to sleep until about 8am. After feeding, changing & dressing him, I put Finn in his beloved bouncer whilst I made my first coffee of the day. My pod machine was a Christmas gift after I'd had a Nespresso machine before & switched but then I missed it! So I got out my old favourite cup which I used to use every morning when I left the house at 7am to commute to Belfast. How I don't miss those days! Anywho, today was the first time I took Finn to a baby massage class so it was a hectic morning getting everything ready. By the time we had arrived he was fast asleep and didn't wake up until nearly the end of the class, so he only got a very brief bit of massage on one leg! After this I went to pick up a prescription and we had a quick walk along the sea front. Quick being the operative word as it was so windy! 

11:30am

We returned home & I hoped I'd have chance to grab my breakfast after just having a banana before we left. Of course, I took one mouthful of cereal & Finn decided he was hungry again too! I'd just boiled the kettle ready for a cup of tea so I got to sit down & enjoy that after feeding Finn. 

We did used to have a daily contact nap but Finn didn't seem to want that anymore until yesterday when I was stood up bouncing him & he fell fast asleep on me. To my surprise, he did the same thing this afternoon & has stayed asleep which has given me the chance to sit & start this post! Whilst he was sleeping it gave me chance to catch up on some TV; I finished up the new series of Emily in Paris, watched the 1st episode of series two of Love Life (Netflix) & the 1st episode of The Great Pottery Throw Down (Channel 4). 

After I put Finn down to continue his nap, I decided it was time to put some of our decorations back up. I took down all the festive ones right after Christmas, but haven't replaced them yet with our usual things so everything looks a bit bare at the moment! We are in the midst of making some big changes to the layout of the house to create a home office space & move Finn into the bigger bedroom so we will be painting & building lots of furniture! We collected a 2nd hand daybed yesterday & have been selling bits of our furniture that we won't need anymore along the way to clear space. I've been searching the sales & found some really good bargains, most of which arrive tomorrow so that will keep Tom busy as he is the builder of things!! Overall, we need everything to be more functional for us & now seemed a good time to do it before Finn is walking about. Whilst doing my other daily jobs in the house, like cleaning the bathroom or food prep, I've been listening to "Just One Thing - with Michael Mosley," which is an interesting podcast that talks about small changes you could make in life. I've also been listening to "All in the Mind," from BBC Radio 4. 

7pm

As part of our new routine, we are trying out a bath, bottle, bed approach. Finn absolutely LOVES the bath & kicks like crazy when he's in there! I bought a Nuby watering can for the bath & as soon as he sees it he gets so excited. He has very sensitive skin like I do & we've found the best stuff for him is Child's Farm. It can be quite expensive (I always buy it on offer!) but it lasts ages. The scents are all gorgeous & the nappy cream really works. I sit & write this section at 9.30pm where Finn has been asleep now for a good hour & we are sat intently watching him on the monitor & missing him! But, given that he's already having a good rest, we know a routine is what he needs. P.s. I'm now on the decaf!

 

10pm 

I became quite fixated on skincare when I was pregnant & that has become an important part of my daily routine. I'm sure there should be some stuff that would be better done in the morning, but I like to think it will all sink into my skin overnight. I always go to the Boots sale at Christmas & this year I managed to find some nice sets of No7 skincare so I've been using that. I also found the 'Glow' facial brush which is a good exfoliator for me so I've been using that every day too. I got a free pot of Weleda Body Butter with my magazine subscription & it works so well for my skin. As does the Child's Farm handcream which I got free with an order from Boots.

I've also been trying to read again & always compile a small list throughout the year to pop on my Christmas list. I have a good pile now to work my way through, so when time allows I have been diving back into reading. After reading his previous book; "The Diary of a Bookseller," I asked for the follow up title by Shaun Bythell and have been working my way through that. It's a small book so I'm sure it won't take me long! 

Overall, it has been a busy but productive Monday for me! In between Finn's naps, I had to sort out various appointments that start up again this week like his next Health Visitor appointment & vaccinations. It was so nice to have a break from all that during Christmas but the house visits should get less frequent now. The rest of the week will be a similar level of activity but will be my last week at home just Finny & me before things change again. I'm so grateful that I can still be at home with him & he can spend a bit more time with his daddy & other family. 

Thanks for reading xo

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On entering motherhood.

I've realised that however much I intend to sit down and write here, somehow months pass, or in this case - a year has passed - and it always takes me by surprise. But I went for a walk today and whilst watching the waves and clearing my mind it felt like the perfect time to jot down some thoughts. 

At the start of 2022 we learnt that I was pregnant, and although that moment was something I'd dreamed of for as long as I can remember, we couldn't believe it was real. I'm certainly not the first to say that from that moment on, life as you know it is completely different. My body was already changing and we had lots of preparations to make. What followed was a series of other huge life changes including having to switch jobs and undergo a house move. Packing and moving was incredibly stressful but we were so grateful to be in a much more suitable home for us to welcome a baby and we still live very close to the sea.

My pregnancy was pretty straightforward save for the fact that I have always really struggled with anything medical including injections/shots and up until my first hospital appointment, I'd never even had a blood test. All the things I went through following that were very hard for me mentally and I had to find my own coping mechanisms. I told all doctors/nurses/midwives not to describe what they were about to do and that seemed to help me to channel my mind to deal with the situation. At the time of birth, I had a constant supply of gas & air so that helped too! 

I went 12 days overdue (so my September baby became an October baby!) and chose to have an induction to get things moving. Although childbirth was absolutely handsdown the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, I was so grateful that I was able to have the water birth I'd hoped for. It was such a calm experience and I remember all the midwives coming in to our room in the hours that followed saying how relaxed the room was. It just all felt so meant to be. As soon as he arrived, it felt like he had always been here with us. Such a miracle. 

Finn Shepherd has changed our lives in the most wonderful way. Watching him grow, change and learn each day is such a joy. Whenever he smiles it's like nothing else in the world matters because I know he is happy. I am proud of how Tom and I have adjusted to our new addition and we've focused on giving each other what we need to refresh and keep going. For me, that looks like taking my sacred hour or so in the evening for a long hot bubble bath, usually with a podcast/audiobook/music or just silence. I also became pretty obsessed with skincare whilst I was pregnant so I like to take my time to do that nightly ritual. My walks with Finn double up as self-care for me because I love being outdoors and looking at the sea, plus it's good for my healing to get myself moving. The pram usually sends Finn to sleep so then I get some quiet time once we get back home too. I'm slowly learning to use the nap times to pick up things like crafts or reading and other times I can quickly do jobs in the house like prep a slow cooker meal, do laundry or other small things. Some days none of that is possible if Finn wants to use me as a human sofa and that's just fine by me!

I've learnt how much Tom and I both love routine and rituals and we've both naturally fallen into our own roles that help keep everything going. I think for us that's helped maintain a calm and peaceful home, but we know that Finn is the priority and the other things can wait. I've focussed on making our home as cosy as possible so we can all relax and enjoy a positive environment. I recently read "My Hygge Home" by Meik Wiking [find it here] and that gave me some great ideas about how to foster connection in the home. I have read all his books and found the concept of 'hygge' pretty transformational after I read his first book a few years ago [find it here]. I'm sure I've written about it before! 

I have felt quite protective over our newborn bubble and although we have gone on trips the three of us or I've taken Finn out by myself, I am not putting any pressure on us to do that too often at this stage. We enjoy being home and having the comfort of the routine we are building and that just feels too precious to me to disrupt it too much. I've decided to wait until the new year before trying different groups and activities with Finn so we can all just soak up the comfort of home for as long as possible. I know it will be good for both of us to socialise and have new experiences but at the moment we are happy as we are! 

Most of the time, I can't believe it's all happening and I'm actually a Mum. I cherish the moments when Finn and I just stare at each other, trying to take each other in and figure each other out. The love I feel for him is wild. Watching him and Tom bond is like nothing else. I can't wait to watch Finn grow and discover and to see the world through his eyes. We have so many memories to make!

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