On welcoming autumn.

We are back to my favourite time of year again...I adore the 'ber' months! Although this spring was more special than usual, I still always look forward to the autumn and winter months. I think my deepened love for it has a lot to do with the boys being born during these seasons which gave me reason to truly hibernate and to slow down (in some senses!), in way that I'd never done before. Before I moved to NI and met Tom, I was always on the go, always travelling somewhere. I don't think I would've called myself that much of a home bird. But life now is a very stark contrast to that. The early days of Finn were largely long, sleepy snuggles under blankets, with a quick walk to give us both fresh air and to help Finn's circadian rhythm. I loved those quiet, cosy days hidden away in our little bubble. Of course, Zach was then born in winter, and it although it was quite challenging to get them out on my own, I did it as often as I felt able. I think part of me longs to keep recreating that feeling of hibernation, of fairy lights, candles and blankets. Of making soups, stews and pies and all the other comforting meals to warm us up. To sit by the fire with a good book, and to enjoy precious, quiet days as a family in our safe space. 

One of the things I've been reflecting on that inevitably gains more traction this year, is how much consumerism is getting out of control. I watch a lot of YouTube commentary on social media trends and what is going on online, it is making me see how much pressure there is to buy certain things to feel like you aren't missing out. For me, this time of year isn't about 'things' as much as it is about slowing down, but all I keep seeing is 'hauls' of this and that, and people rushing out to buy as much as they possibly can to decorate their homes or update their wardrobes. I am as guilty as anyone for buying home decor (ask my long suffering husband), but the things I have are not particularly expensive, nor are they single use. I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to make your home look and feel the way you want it to, but I can't help but think that the way things are going is very concerning. I saw a post on Facebook recently regarding a 'Gilmore Girls' themed blanket which is available in one retail chain and keeps selling out. The author said she had never watched a single episode of the show, but she had seen everyone else posting about the blanket, so she had to go and find it. I thought this was such a reflection of what social media can do. It makes you feel like you need to have certain things purely because they are going 'viral,' whether you like the item or not. I have seen other videos of back to school hauls where young people are showing off their new clothes and accessories after spending $1,000s, making it look like this is normal. I have seen commentary videos of 'pack my Stanley cup for a walk,' where when they break down the cost of all the accessories (for a cup..!), it adds up to $100s. People are constantly trying to sell you something, without making it look like they are, and it really worries me that so many children are seeing this type of stuff and then asking for it. So much of it is so unnecessary and is just throwaway - it doesn't add any value or meaning to anyone's life. I know that as soon as Christmas has been and gone, the internet will be awash with 'Christmas Hauls' that people will then compare themselves to. I find it bizarre that people are making so much money from creating content about absolute nonsense, but you can see how quickly it spreads and new trends emerge. 

I think you can also see such a decline in individuality, because everybody is seeking the same things to be a part of this 'viral' crowd. People are afraid to say they don't like things, or to have their own individual tastes, because then they aren't part of the movement. I saw a video recently of a Mum who bought her daughter an off-brand Stanley cup and everyone picked on her because it was fake, so she came home heartbroken begging for the real $60 version. Things are just going so far off track for what life is all about, and I want to protect our boys from this for as long as possible. I want this time of year especially to be about celebrating together, enjoying nature, giving and receiving thoughtful gifts, making yummy food together, reading good books, doing some crafts, snuggling up under blankets, warming up by the fire, watching movies and drinking hot chocolate. The simple things that create good memories. 

I wrote last time about how I'd been daydreaming of running my own book club, and I can now share that this dream is becoming a reality next month! I have been a member of my online 'Chapter' for almost a year, and they are now starting a new club in my area which I will be the host of. I am very excited to get going, and hope we can meet lots of new people and create a lovely bookish community. I have absolutely loved rediscovering my love of reading, and have now read 41 books to date this year. I love how much it helps my imagination, and allows me to escape to different worlds, new places, and to get to know new characters. My book club has been a special place for me to connect with people and make new friends, to share recommendations and to reflect on what we've read, as well as encouraging me to read things I wouldn't have chosen for myself. Hobbies are such a great way to meet like-minded people, and I'm so thankful that I decided to take the plunge, because it has now given me such an exciting opportunity for my own club, with all the support behind me. I set up my own Instagram page (more commonly known as Bookstagram!) which has been a fun creative outlet for me, and it has connected me with some wonderful people, including authors and publishers, and it feels like such a wholesome corner of the internet. I want to learn a bit more about social media and to create some good content that people enjoy looking at. 

This blog post is perhaps a little different to what I've written the last while, but I have been reflecting a lot on how I spend my time, and what is important to me. It is a very tiring stage of life, so our downtime is very precious, and I don't want to spend it consuming content that makes me feel like more 'stuff' would fix everything. You don't need a bunch of things to make the most of any season, just the things that mean the most to you. Watching the boys play every day has made me realise how little 'stuff' they really need, and how much they enjoy just having the freedom to explore. We live a pretty humble life; I still buy most of my clothes from Vinted, I trawl charity shops and often get very lucky with local groups offering free toys, I get books 2nd hand or use ebooks, and the main hobby Tom enjoys is gaming, so we allow ourselves treats relating to those, but otherwise we just get by and enjoy family days out as often as we can. My aim is always to be content with what we have, trying not to get caught up in the comparison trap, knowing how blessed we are to have everything we need. 

As we enter this time of year, I hope we can all slow down and reflect on the beauty all around us, knowing we don't really need much to make life feel special. Sometimes, the most exciting thing that can happen in your day is seeing some ducks....

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On rediscovering reading.

I've always loved reading. Being a natural born introvert, it is the perfect hobby. But after I graduated University (already a scary amount of years ago!) I lost my way with it. I'd mainly binge on holiday, where I'd pick up whatever random books people had left behind in the hotel, though it was never much of any substance but it was nice to entertain my imagination for a couple of weeks all the same.

With 2017 approaching, I decided to set resolutions (as always), the main one being to read more. I discovered Goodreads - a website packed with book recommendations, reviews and ways to share your recent reads with others. It also allows you to keep track of what you've read and set yourself reading challenges. For 2017, I started out with 20 as my goal and soon doubled it.

I asked for recommendations from my Facebook friends and set about reading a couple of those and it all sort of snowballed from there. I now have a reading list as long as my arm (and it is always growing) and I've tried to challenge myself to explore different themes and genres. I really needed to branch out from my very niche theme of cowboy fiction, so to Goodreads I went!

I visit our local library on an almost weekly basis now and am so grateful that our town thought it was important enough to invest in a new library whilst many others are closing them down. It also saves me a lot of money and shelf storage! Our library has a great section on audiobooks which have now replaced country music on my driving trips!

I tend to veer towards non-fiction; memoirs are usually the ones I can never put down and I do hang out a lot in the Faith section but I've been delving back into fiction in-between some of the heavier stuff. I thought it would be fun to share some of my favourites from recent times and as always, would welcome any other choices.


1) Bob Goff - Everybody Always (non-fiction). I admire this guy so much. I was so excited to be in the US when this book was released and purposefully made myself read this slowly so I didn't devour it in an instant. His writing is pure, humble and kind. We all have a lot to learn from him. Bob sends all the profits from his first book, Love Does (also amazing) to his non-profit (of the same name) which is doing insanely courageous work.

2) Gail Honeyman - Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine (fiction). This was a debut book and it absolutely blew me away. I have never felt such a strong connection to a character before, but there was something so genuine, heart-warming and pure about Eleanor. It was a beautiful read, one which I'm sure I'll delve into again.

3) Brené Brown - Braving the Wilderness (non-fiction). Brené writes with such convincing authority. She has walked out, wrestled with and been challenged by what she shares and asks of others. Her works are thoroughly researched and I cannot stress how needed her wisdom is. I highlighted line after line and folded over nearly every corner of this book to go back to - it is gold. 

4) Jodi Picoult - Small Great Things (fiction). This was a heavy, emotional read that was focussed on some very difficult subjects. Some of the reviews for this were mixed - but it made me think and do further research, so I think that makes it a success!

5) Shauna Niequist - Present Over Perfect (non-fiction). For me, Shauna is up there in my list of heroes (along with Bob Goff) and I told approximately anyone I've met since I read this that they too, need to read it. This book led me to do a lot of re-evaluating, deciding what is important to me and what I should dedicate my time to. I adore her poetic style and the way she walks with such integrity.

If you're interested - here is my Goodreads page; it's a great community, I hope you decide to join it too!

Love, S x

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Inspiration Station.

I can't believe the last time I sat to write was Easter. These past few weeks have flown by unusually quickly and I feel like I need to catch up a bit! I haven't neglected the writing due to lack of inspiration, quite the opposite actually! So much has changed lately that I feel a bit overwhelmed and don't even know where to begin. I suppose the biggest change is that I now feel settled in a new Church. I've already made some great friends and am enjoying getting stuck into life with those guys. I feel my heart shifting towards this new place, with this group of people and am excited about where the next few weeks might lead me. Check them out here. They are involved with lots of great community stuff, and this is the place where CAP (Christians Against Poverty) all began.

The main thing that has prompted me to write comes from a book I am reading at the moment. I was finally persuaded to pick it up as I was looking for something that was bound to inspire and stir me up. So far, it has passed that test as I knew it would, with flying colours! The book is called 'Undaunted' and is written by Christine Caine. After reading one of her previous books; 'Stop acting like a Christian and be one,' I fell in love with her honesty and uncompromising style. It's just so refreshing. I actually started reading Undaunted right before a shift at work and found even the first chapter left me heart broken and totally distracted all day.

You see, we all have dreams dont we? As i've said before, i'm a real daydreamer. I sit and think about when I will have my first youth work job, getting paid to do what I really love. Maybe i'll have my own office. Or then i'll be able to have my own home...full of trinkets and bedspreads (as I seem to have a weakness for bed linen.) Or marriage, family, future holidays or places I'd like to travel to. I know we all do it! Imagine if one day, somebody came to you and just offered you your dream. A fresh start, a new country, provision for your family, your dream job - but more than that - a HOPE that you didn't think would ever come to you. Imagine you are feeling hopeless, like you've given up, you're trapped, you'll never get out of this situation. In a dead end job, with little money, a house you hate or in a place you can't stand - and someone comes out of the blue to offer you a way out of that. How likely would it be that you would at least consider it? That glimmer of hope?

Say, you go for it. You trust that person. You move, ready to start your new adventure, a better life that secures a brighter future for you and your family - only to be trapped. It's not the place it was supposed to be. You were moved under false pretences, lied to, beaten, abused repeatedly. Trafficked. 

You may have guessed why this book left me distracted. This is the fate of so many people today. 27 million. Even as I write this, or as I continue to read the book this is happening. People are being SOLD. Trapped in shipping containers as if they are a product. Men, women and children. Forced into labour or the sex trade. Slavery is so REAL. It's happening right here, in my community, in my town, in my city and likely in yours too. This issue is bigger than ever before. We need to speak out! We need to educate, to spot the signs, to intervene, to rescue, to act, to pray, to speak out, to END IT. We musn't ignore it, or make it feel distant. This doesn't just happen in far away countries, poorer than ours.  You don't have to look far in the news to find it. These people; mothers, daughters, sisters, brothers, fathers - are being BOUGHT and SOLD. Human beings, just like you and I. We can no longer sit back  and pretend like this injustice isn't taking place day in, day out. Because it is!

I have blogged about the A21 Campaign before, and the author of this book is the freedom fighter behind this amazing Charity. Even if you aren't a Christian, I would recommend you read even just the first Chapter. It's actually on offer at $2.99/£2.99 as an E-book at the moment so now might be the time to snap it up. Christine writes with much more conviction than I do, but also has real life experiences in rescuing women from trafficking, which are heart breaking accounts - but a necessary read. There are also other great campaigns that speak out - The End It Movement, Restored For, Stop the Traffik, Hope for Justice, MTV Exit and Walk Free.

I think it's important that our hearts break for issues such as this, that we are moved to do something to eradicate it once and for all. Fundraise, talk about it, raise awareness, sign petitions - get involved. Freedom for all is something we must fight and keep on fighting for...

Much Love xxx

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Thankful Thoughts.

I really LOVE receiving post. I know exactly what time the postman is supposed to arrive at my door and if I am at home I will watch the clock until I hear that old familiar clatter of letters and parcels every day. (I can imagine that's what it feels like to be a dog waiting for the newspaper.) I guess that's one of the perks to shopping online because it takes a few clicks and I often forget I've even sent off for whatever it is so it works out as a lovely surprise. I've always preferred catching up with people via pretty notecards and postcards however in order to be an effective pen pal, the recipient is expected to reply. *hint hint* I just think it's always nice to have something to wait for, something that doesn't arrive in an instant. It takes time to sit and reply and to reflect on what has actually happened in your week in order to fill a card with information and questions to keep your conversation going. Why am I rambling on about this?

There has been one piece of post in particular that I have been eagerly awaiting, which was kind of annoying because it had a 10-14 working day delivery estimate. Everyday, I was hoping it would arrive and today it finally did! I realise I am building this up to something that is sure to disappoint you...it's not a time machine or the Cath Kidston dress that I've been coveting for weeks. It is in fact, a book.

I saw it when I was looking for something else on Amazon and read the description. Straight away,  I knew this woman was my kinda gal. I started reading it this evening and can confirm my early suspicions. I love it. I've only read a chapter and a half so far, so I know i'm merely on the cusp of her message but I already feel inspired. She first describes the pain of loss in her life and her reaction to blame God. She then states how one day, that all changed when she had a revelation.

I want to first share her picture of our human dissatisfaction. For this, she takes it back to the Garden of Eden:

'But in the beginning, our eyes were already open. Our site was perfect. Our vision let us see a world spilling with goodness. Our eyes fell on nothing but the glory of God. We saw God as He truly is: good. But we were lured by the deception that there was more to a full life, there was more to see. And, true, there was more to see: the ugliness we hadn't beheld, the sinfulness we hadn't witnessed, the loss we hadn't known.'

It's interesting, this. The thought that our dissatisfaction is part of our human nature. Of course, this is also a picture of us knowing better than God. We humans could have seen God in all His glory and accepted Him as He is and would have been grateful, but we would all have given in to the temptation of 'there must be something more.' Now, don't get me wrong - I am NOT saying there is anything wrong with ambition. I think ambition is good and is necessary to help us grow as people, but there has to be a limit. You only have to look at people chasing fame, they will seemingly do anything to get on TV, to become known by everyone - they want more and more until all of a sudden it becomes too much and they become empty. They could never be satisfied with what they had so they hungered for more and found nothing. They can't go to a coffee shop whenever they feel like it because they get chased by the paparazzi. They can't put on a few extra pounds because that sparks pregnancy rumours. They can't lose any pounds because then they have an eating disorder. They can't spend time with a friend because they might sell gossip to a magazine. Who can they trust? Where can they go?

This season of my life has been full of challenges. I've let go of fears, thoughts that I need to plan out my entire life, the 'what if I make the wrong decision?' doubts. I've found hope that if I keep knocking - the right door will open. I've done the waiting, the filling in of applications, the asking for help, the meeting new people but by far my favourite lesson - living in the here and now. You see, anything can happen tomorrow. We can't worry about that - what do we have today? What can we be thankful for, what can we be moved by, what can we appreciate right here and now?  This is where I link back to my new book. We need to be satisfied with what we have today. It's ok to want things, like I wanted my post (an abnormal amount! ha.) Or like I want a job and my own place, a relationship, children. But I also want to be grateful and thankful for what I have NOW. 

It's easy to be dissatisfied when we think our lives are boring. The key is this, as written by Christine Caine (my hero of the moment):

'We must begin to value our seemingly mundane lives and routines, understanding that each day God has opportunities waiting for us to meet the needs of others.'

I love this! It gives me hope that in my unemployed state, I still have a purpose! I still have lives to impact, people to meet, serve, love and befriend. I've been involved in all sorts, i've been busy building new friendships and restoring old ones. I've had time to rest and to read. I've watched on average one movie every day for as long as I can remember. I've been stirred up as I've researched things such as Human Trafficking (as you may have noticed!) I've been motivated to DO something. I have found joy in not knowing what tomorrow may bring and gratitude for what I have received today. 

Back to my book again. 

'The only place we need see before we die is this place of seeing God, here and now. I whisper it out loud, let the tongue feel these sounds, the ear hear their truth.' 

Previous to this she unpacks the word 'Eucharist' from it's Greek root and it becomes...

'Charis - Grace.

 Eucharisteo - Thanksgiving.

 Chara - Joy. [these are described by her as a 'threefold cord...that might make up the meaning of everything]'

Is that what we need to be satisfied? Grace, from God that our mistakes are forgiven and we can have LIFE, thanks for all the wonderful things we are given, the people in our lives, the things that we love and joy in all circumstances? I think so. I guess it all seems so simple, which is maybe why we can't grasp it. I think it is a daily battle to be satisfied. I will admit now; I have about 6 beautiful handbags that I can switch between when I feel like a change. I go to Cath Kidston (she's had a double mention today!) and I'll see a new print or a new style and I want it. Forget the 5 I already have, I want that one, I need that one. Do I? No. I could think, 'Sarah, you already have more than the average person when it comes to handbags - why not be glad for what you have?' I could even think, what about the people in my country, my county, my town who might have to live off £20 a week. Who can't get on to the benefits system, who can't get work, who can't switch their heating on, who are brought here against their will and forced to do things they don't want to do. Then it all becomes insignificant. What I should think is - look at what I HAVE! It's more than I need, more than I deserve so how can I share it?

A few things I was thankful for today were these views:

I want to live a life thankful not just for things (that let's be real - in the grand scheme of things, I don't need) but for purpose, potential and the gifts I have been given that can be used to bless others. I am grateful for the beauty that is around me, the way that God shows off with sites such as the above images and for the relationships I have that I couldn't POSSIBLY do life without. I love ya!

Much Love xxx

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